


Home

by tatapioca



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-01
Updated: 2014-04-01
Packaged: 2018-01-17 19:29:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,331
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1399708
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tatapioca/pseuds/tatapioca
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kuroko shows Akashi that being relaxed around someone else isn't that hard and bad.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Home

One thing Akashi doesn’t understand is how easy it is for Kuroko to let his guard down around him. Not that he minds it, the opposite is the case, but when he sometimes falls asleep while they’re both sitting on the couch reading a book each and his head leans against his shoulder, that’s when Akashi can’t help but wonder. Wonder what it’s like to feel so at ease to be able to do that just like this. Because he knows for sure that he is unable to.

It’s because of him that they don’t even sleep in the same bed and each has their own. When he tells Kuroko about his decision, he only nods as if he has expected that already and isn’t surprised at all and Akashi doesn’t know if he has become predictable or if the other just knows him well. He knows it could be considered strange that he refuses to share a bed with him and he knows that their friends who help them move into their apartment are confused about it, but Kuroko doesn’t question it even once. 

That’s because Kuroko knows. He knows that his boyfriend doesn’t know how to deal with closeness that well yet and it is almost funny how the one who seems to always know everything has difficulty accepting something that is normal for most people. But Akashi is different than most and Kuroko knows that and likes it.

When he wakes up and tries to remember where he is, it doesn’t take Kuroko long, seeing the familiar living room it is obvious he has fallen asleep while reading again. He likes reading after a long day to get his mind off and away from reality, but it isn’t unusual for him to be so exhausted that sleep finds him quicker than he wants it to. He moves his head off of Akashi’s shoulder, mumbling an apology although he knows he doesn’t have to, but he only gets a sideglance and a small nod as reply before Akashi’s eyes wander back to what he is reading.

A few minutes pass, Kuroko is still fighting with the last bit of sleepiness, when he realizes that something is weird and it doesn’t take him long to figure out what it is.

"Akashi-kun..?" He says his name quietly, making the other look to him. "You haven’t turn a page around for too long and normally you would be done reading it already. Is everything alright?" 

The only sign that he feels caught is that his eyes widen just a tiny bit, other than that Akashi looks the same as always.

"There is nothing to worry about. I’m thinking about something, that is all." Kuroko knows he is trying to brush him off and doesn’t wish to talk about it, but they both know it won’t work.

"May I ask what you are thinking about?" 

There is a short moment of silence between them, before Akashi closes his book and puts it on the small table in front of them.

"I was thinking about you, actually. I was wondering about.." It’s unlike him to not finish his sentences and Kuroko holds his hand and slightly squeezes it when he notices that Akashi is about to move it to his throat, something he only does when he feels uncomfortable. Kuroko thinks it’s because he feels as if he is suffocating. If there is one thing that can disturb him like this it’s admitting that he has weaknesses and Kuroko knows he would never show this to anyone but him.

"About..?" He inquires softly and Akashi lets out a sigh.

"About why it is so easy for you to let yourself be so defenseless when someone else is present."

Ah, it’s that. 

"I feel safe with Akashi-kun, that’s why it isn’t hard at all." Is his short and honest reply, but he can tell that while his boyfriend hears what he is saying, he can’t truly understand his words. "Being with Akashi-kun is easy. It’s nice and comfortable and warm. It feels like home." 

There is something that can be best described as darkness in Akashi’s eyes when Kuroko says the word ‘home’ and he knows it will be impossible to talk to him now without Akashi putting more distance between them and shutting himself off, so Kuroko squeezes his hand one last time and then lets it go, picking his book up again to read because he knows this conversation is over for now. 

He doesn’t need to force him to say it, he knows Akashi associates anything but warmth with the word ‘home’ and he hopes he can change that one day. Kuroko doesn’t feel offended that the other can’t let himself go and feel at complete ease with him yet. It’s enough that he can show him that he is vulnerable, even only for a short moment. He knows how hard it is for him and that he needs more time.

-

It’s two weeks later when Akashi orders him to lie down in his bed and Kuroko is even more confused when he slips next to him under the blanket. What’s even more strange is that he seems to be nervous and before Kuroko has the chance to ask, he gets an explanation and it starts to make sense.

"I want to try something out. I’d like to find out what that home you spoke of is like." 

Kuroko feels the urge to laugh how he says it, how alien a simple word like home seems to be to the mighty Akashi Seijuurou, if only it wouldn’t be so sad that a concept like that is foreign to him.

"Alright." He says instead and watches him silenty for some minutes, realizing it won’t work like that.

"You are too tense." Kuroko points out, reaching out to hold his hand. "You shouldn’t think about anything. The more you try, the less you will be able to relax." 

Kuroko would lie if he said that he doesn’t like it how Akashi looks at him, silently asking him to show him what he is supposed to do, but too proud to say it and Kuroko turns to lie on his back and tugs on his boyfriend’s arm, signaling him to roll on top of him. He also enjoys that he does as he tells him to, letting Kuroko take the lead and be the one to guide him for once, instead of it being the other way around.

"Everything is fine, Akashi-kun. You don’t have to worry about anything." 

It takes quite some time and a lot of mumbled reassuring words til his breathing slows down and the tension leaves his body. His head is resting on Kuroko’s chest, eyes closed and he is sure that he has finally managed to fall asleep, but Kuroko still continues caressing his hair softly til he can’t stay awake anymore either.

-

Kuroko is the first one that wakes up, but it doesn’t take long for Akashi to do the same and Kuroko can’t help but smile when he sees the surprised look in his eyes when he looks up to him and it fills him with warmth when the surprise on his face turns into happiness. It wouldn’t be obvious to others, but he can tell from the soft look in his eyes how he feels and it’s even more apparent to him when Akashi gives him a gentle kiss on the lips and then lets his head lie on his chest again, his eyes closed once again.

He doesn’t say it, but Kuroko knows that the kiss is supposed to be a thank you and that he found his answer and won’t associate ‘home’ with anything negative now. Needless to say there won’t be any need for two beds in their apartment anymore because he knows now what it’s like to really feel safe with someone and with that in mind Kuroko drifts off back to sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> I couldn't sleep and then this happened. I just feel like sleeping is a very vulnerable state to be in because you're unable to defend yourself and Akashi is the kind of person who wouldn't want to be weak, especially not when someone else is there to witness it. 
> 
> I just wanted to write fluff tbh. Criticism is of course welcome, but that should go without having to be pointed out.


End file.
